I was utterly flabbergasted by term “alternative facts,” recently coined by Trump spinmeister Kellyanne Conway to explain the latest falsehoods from the new White House. I don’t think Saturday Night Live could have come up with something so zany. So I wrote this poem. Laughter is one of the few weapons we’ve got left, so let’s keep slinging it at “Tweetybird.”
Alternative Facts
By Bev Kaufman
Are you reeling from unending attacks?
Are you bloodied by the media hacks?
Do you dread the latest SNL cracks?
Just answer them with “alternative facts.”
Do diversity hounds circle in packs,
Reminding you that your mandate lacks
Support from women, gays, and blacks?
Bamboozle them with “alternative facts.”
Has the latest gaffe put you on the rack,
Something so dumb that you can’t walk it back?
Might the Trump do a dump, giving you the sack?
Then lace your resume with “alternative facts.”